Why? Because He Loves
April 16th, 2008
You must picture me alone in that room in Magdalen, night after night, feeling, whenever my mind lifted even for a second from my work, the steady, unrelenting approach of Him of whom I so earnestly desired not to meet….I gave in, and admitted that God was God, and knelt and prayed: perhaps, that night, the most dejected and reluctant convert in all England. I did not then see what is now the most shining and obvious thing; the Divine humility which will accept a convert even on such terms. The Prodigal Son at least walked home on his own feet. But who can duly adore that Love which will open the high gates to a prodigal who is brought in kicking, struggling, resentful, and darting his eyes in every direction for a chance of escape?
(C.S. Lewis inYours, Jack, page 9, and Surprised by Joy, Chapter 14)
Never does much time go by when I don’t wonder why God would choose to save me. After I read this passage last night from Yours, Jack I began wondering all over again. Even though I know the answer, I still ask why me?
Weary
November 26th, 2007
I’m not much in a posting mood tonight. Bren and Erik broke up today and it’s final. Please pray for them both.
Now, Where Was I?…
February 15th, 2007
Seattle.
Our five days in Seattle were a whirlwind, made much more enjoyable by a little red Mustang rental car. I grinned like a teenager when the guy handed me the keys. Sports cars never did much for me visually, but those engines….Now I know what the fuss is all about.
Cancer.
Spending hours every day for three days in a cancer treatment hospital was very sobering. Bald heads. Weak bodies. Hopeless expressions. Fear. Angels in white coats. The level of care and compassion in the hospital staff was a bit of a shock to me after a lifetime of militalry hospitals. It was amazing to see and feel.
Friend.
Leah and I got to know each other better, as women who share a hotel room for a week are likely to do. She is strong and funny and insanely clean. I love her more now than I did a week ago. Leah and her husband returned to Seattle on Monday and she underwent a double mastectomy yesterday. We, along with others in our church family and her mother, are helping to take care of their four children while mom and dad are away. Please pray for Leah’s quick recovery and safe return home to her kiddos.
Bren.
Sigh. This week Bren hurt someone she cares about in order to obey God’s word (2 Cor 6:14-15). It was a test in believing God at His word and trusting Him completely for the outcome. It was, and continues to be tough. Knowing she did the right thing hasn’t made the knot in her stomach and ache in her heart go away. We’ve been praying together daily, asking that God will bring glory to Himself through this, because all she feels like she did was make a young person bitter.
Music.
Rick, Bren, and I, along with Bren’s friend Rachel, attended this concert in Fairbanks on Saturday. Perfection. Amazing. Beautiful.
I missed you.
Blessings.
Do I Honor My God?
January 17th, 2007
Do I bless the LORD every day? Do I meditate on the glorious splendor of His majesty? Do I speak of His mighty acts? Do I delcare His greatness?
And I will bless Your name forever and ever.
Every day I will bless You,
And I will praise Your name forever and ever.
Great is the LORD, and greatly to be praised;
And His greatness is unsearchable
One generation shall praise Your works to another,
And shall declare Your mighty acts.
I will meditate on the glorious splendor of your majesty,
And on Your wondrous works.
Men shall speak of the might of Your awesome acts,
And I will declare Your greatness.
They shall utter the memory of Your great goodness,
And shall sing of Your righteousness.
The LORD is gracious and full of compassion,
Slow to anger and great in mercy.
The LORD is good to all,
And His tender mercies are over all His works.
~ Psalm 145:1-9 NKJV
1f51Praying for Discernment
November 18th, 2006
Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it spring the issues of life. Put away from you a deceitful mouth, and put perverse lips far from you. Let your eyes look straight ahead, and your eyelids look right before you. Ponder the path of your feet, and let all your ways be established. Do not turn to the right or the left; remove your foot from evil. ~ Proverbs 4:23-27
Our sunrise this morning is at 9:32 and sunset will be at 3:33 p.m. We lost 7 minutes of daylight yesterday and will lose 6 more today. Pretty soon our daylight will consist of an orange glow peeking over the horizon for just a couple hours before darkness resumes. Of course all that changes – albeit slowly – after the winter solstice. Meanwhile, I have a strong desire to sleep buried in a comfortably warm bed most of the time. My body yells at me, “It’s dark, go to sleep!”
So, what am I doing up at 8:30 on a Saturday morning? Our friend Kent called this morning to ask if Rick wanted to ride with him to the men’s breakfast at church. Bren answered the phone in her room then came in and crawled into bed with me. She didn’t get to sleep until 3 a.m, so she’ll be out for several more hours. Friday night is the only night she can stay up as late as she wants, so she takes full advantage.
